My Date with M

Average would be the best way to describe it, but I don’t think anything will come out of it. He did three things that were complete deal breakers for me. I know it may seem silly, but I just have to have these three things that need to happen to go out with someone and he is just lacking in them.

1. He didn’t open doors for me. That is a big big big BIG no no in my book. Chivalry may be dead for everyone else, but it most certainly is not dead for me. I expect to have all doors coming out of a place and going into a place opened for me. I really do not think that is too much to ask for.

2. He doesn’t like Doctor Who and said time travel was “played out”. Are you kidding me?! I adore the Doctor! I could tolerate it a bit more if you just haven’t watched the show, but to say you don’t like it at all? That is just a big no no in my book.

3. He doesn’t like Harry Potter! Let me give you a tid-bit about me: I AM OBSESSED with Harry Potter and all things related. I’ve read the books at least 20 times each, I regularly watch the movies, I have a Pottermore account, and check Mugglenet on a regular basis. His reason for not liking Harry Potter? “I don’t understand why they don’t carry around multiple wands because everyone knows the disarming spell”. Are you kidding me? The wand CHOOSES the wizard. You cant just go around having multiple wands! To win a wand, you have to bend its will. You can only have one wand that bends completely to your will at a time!

Really there just wasn’t any kind of chemistry between us. I know those deal breakers might sound silly, but I know what I want. You don’t have to like Doctor Who or Harry Potter to date me, but I do expect you not to have a dislike of them.

Love always,

J.

First Dates

Awkward right? I know, but I have one on tomorrow and I couldn’t be more excited about it! As I mentally and physically (girls take a lot of grooming you know) preparing myself, I can’t help but look back on the few (very few) other first dates I have had. Just did the math and I’ve had four. Geeze I am a hermit, most people my age seem to be going out all the time. Welp, here goes my dating history, I hope you enjoy the comedy of it as much as I do.

B came first. I was a sophomore in high school and he was my first real date. Handsome, muscular, a football player, dumber than a box of rocks, with the personality of a piece of cardboard. I was so excited and couldn’t wait (I was dumb and impressionable). We had our mom’s drop us off at the local movie theater. We sit down and do the awkward arm rest debacle (do we share it, does he take it, do I take it? It is anyone’s guess). Half way though the movie he puts his hands on my crotch and tries to unzip my pants! (I was in total shock people, because unlike most people my age, I am a virgin). I politely told him that we were not going to go there and to remove his hand, which he did. He also apologized like crazy and was obviously mortified. What a way to start off my dating career right? Yikes…

Next came L. L was a country boy (those are never in short supply in WV) who had the pick up truck with the lift kit. We also went to the movies (It is West Virginia people, not a whole lot of things to do). Wasn’t a bad date, He held my hand in the movie and we quietly talked almost the entire movie. A great improvement from B.

Then came E. Oh E, bless his little socially awkward self. E was a guy I worked with at the Big K who did MMA fighting on the side (its true, I couldn’t make these things up if I wanted to people). We went to dinner at a local restaurant. He was so nervous about making a good impression that he stuttered though out the entire date. Wasn’t so bad that I didn’t give him a second chance though, we went out for 6 months.

And finally we have C. C is the guy that everyone loves. Sweet, loyal and the guy you just can’t help but to like. Kind of like that sweet stray dog that wanders into your yard that you take in. We went to a mexican restaurant and stayed for at least 3 hours. Sometimes you just click with people, and he was someone that I just clicked with. Of course he got a second date and we went out for 6 months and broke up pretty recently.

Well, that is the history of my first dates. I will be adding M to that list soon enough to see how he measures up.

 

J.